141. What Depression is Like – Kinda

I am writing this blog on Friday, November 16. This has been a depressing week, in the general sense of the word, for I have not been depressed in the clinical sense of the word.

On Monday, the flu descended on me with a dull thump. As the saying goes, I was sicker than a dog. As the flu started to abate on Wednesday, I was the victim of a second thumping – one of the worst colds I have ever had. On a wellness scale of 1 to 10, I was a 3 at best. To compound matters, I slept dreadfully Wednesday night and awoke Thursday morning in a fog.

The result of this onslaught was that I could not think clearly, had a fever and headaches, and had the energy level of a malnourished and sickly ant. I ached with each step. I moaned with each small task. I just wanted people to leave me alone.  That’s when I thought, “This is like the depression I went through for five years.”

Not a chance! It isn’t even close. There were times in my clinical depression when I was at a -10 on the wellness scale, maybe even a -20 at times. There were literally times when I didn’t know who I was.

Those of you who have experienced major depression know what I’m talking about. For those who haven’t, perhaps my recent illustration will give you a new framework for understanding the condition.

Don’t worry about me now. Today I’m up to a 5 and getting better each hour. Next week I’ll be up to an 8 or 9. Flu and colds pass quickly; depression can linger for a long time – for me five years, for others a lifetime.

About Patrick Day

In 2010, I escaped from four long years of deep, dark depression. This blog shares lessons I learned from those years as depicted in my autobiography - How I Escaped from Depression - as well as other insights about depression and anxiety that only come from someone who has gone through it. When you have a heart attack, you become an expert in heart attacks. When you have diabetes, you become an expert in that condition. As such, I am an expert in depression, with a four-year experiential degree and graduate studies in how to live a life going forward that keeps the ever-lurking Depression at a healthy distance.
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One Response to 141. What Depression is Like – Kinda

  1. Bob says:

    I understand. I’m just ending my second week of what you have. Add a gut leval cough on my side. Your right though, it does get better. You cross my mind often when I am looking for encouragement. Our conversations bring lots of tools and hope to my down times. Thanks for your friendship.

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