MY FAMILIAR COMPANION
I follow James Edgar Skye on his blog called Bipolar Writer James Edgar Skye.
He posted this entry in which he refers to depression as his familiar companion. In my book, How I Escaped from Depression, I refer to Depression as my old friend, just as he does. I can relate to how he expresses what depression does to him. It did so to me during the four years of my bout with clinical depression.
It’s been a while, my friend. You often leave me for small periods of time where I feel more like myself, and less like the person who has no control. You walk out just as quickly as you walk back into my life.
When you are here, I lose control. Even if its temporary.
We are old friends, who often find ourselves in the darkest of places, in the worst possible ways in the depths of my mind. I never had a relationship quite like the one that you and I have had—depression my familiar companion.
Three days ago you told me, “It’s going to be a long few days my friend.”
I didn’t believe you, and you laughed in my face. You told me we will be in a familiar place and that I would not be able to shake you.
It’s true. You never really leave me. You come into my life at the most inopportune times when I need to focus. You take that best parts of me. You take my will to be creative. To write. To function. I know I must fight you.
My familiar companion. Taking me to the deepest and darkest places of my mind. I might as well embrace you as a family member. For that is what you are to me.